Reflections on Aging and Training

Although I'm working in hard both in and out of the pool, I have days when I feel like I'm not moving forward with training. Today was one of those days. In no way is this simply a negative outlook. I'm a realist, and the reality is that I'm not achieving the times in practice that I'm used to seeing the past few years. I feel that I've stepped it up quite a bit the last month or so. I don't expect results overnight, however I'm far from impressed with my recent performances. Even on days when I rev it up for a final 100 Backstroke at the end of practice, I find myself touching in 56 seconds from a push. I have an overwhelming feeling that I need to take it up another notch or I probably won't see any improvement.

The other side of this is the fact that from time to time, I feel insecure about my abilities. I still feel as young as ever, but days when I swim a "fast" 100 backstroke on :56, I start wondering... Am I getting old?! Is this what it's like to age? To watch my lifetime best times disappear in the distance?...

I think everybody has moments when they doubt themselves and their abilities, it's only natural. We can't all walk around feeling like superman every day of the year. We have to see the other side sometimes. Writing about it apparently helps me. I know I'm still capable of times that will impress me. If I make swimming enough of a priority, I'll dig myself out of this speed (or lack thereof) rut. Although I'm aging just like everybody else, I believe hard work and dedication to the sport I love can get me back to where I want to be.